Several weeks ago, I took some of the boys to Isleta Lakes to go fishing. The small lakes get stocked with game fish on a weekly basis. A fellow staff member, who is a very experienced fisherman, provided our group with fishing poles, equipment, bait, and his expertise. We were primed for an enjoyable afternoon of easily reeling in fish with minimal effort. Those fish, however, had other plans. A cold front was rolling in, and our prey settled at the bottom of the lakes, giving no response to our lures. Seven people with seven poles, at least five kinds of bait, over three hours of fishing, and not one fish caught.
I was really disappointed. I enjoy fishing and was looking forward to seeing the boys share in a fun outing. Instead, we sat there, as the wind picked up and the temperature dropped, reeling and recasting; hoping to find the one lucky spot where the fish were still biting. After two hours of this, a couple of the boys lost interest, and began running around and roughhousing, like bored 12-year old boys do.
Having caught nothing, we began packing away the borrowed poles and gear. As I readied the tackle, I braced myself for the boys’ complaints about our wasted afternoon. We had spent some money on the fishing, and had an expectation on the experience. I knew they would be negative after such a failed outing. Instead, they were excited, asking when we could go fishing again. One of them, aware that the activity had cost money, asked if he could reimburse the expense. I assured him that was unnecessary, but appreciated his willingness to share the cost. The boys chatted the entire drive back about the afternoon and where we could go fishing next.
I was confused by their response. These boys, like the fish, zigged when I thought they would zag. I realized that I was projecting my own expectations for the day onto the boys, but really their reactions were much less cynical than mine. As I have thought of this day in the months since, it has occurred to me what a downfall our expectations can be to us. It was only me that was negative about the ‘wasted afternoon’. The boys enjoyed the experience and the opportunity to do something different.
Though we at The Ranches are tasked with teaching the young people in our care, it is often that I also learn things from them. Thank you for all of the experiences, lessons, and opportunities that your support makes possible.
By | Michael Reeves
